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Local College Football Primer for Week 2

No you weren’t dreaming last weekend college football is indeed back!

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I’ve decided to start a weekly blog dedicated to the 2 MAC teams in Northwest Ohio. This may throw our out of state (and yes even out of country readers) for a loop, but like my grandpa told me “be careful sometimes a fart isn’t always just a fart” “never forget your roots.”

Maryland (-750) @ Bowling Green (+475)

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Bowling Green did not have a great showing last week, not that anyone expected them to give Oregon too much trouble in the first place. But I’m not here to bash Bowling Green or their football team. I’ve had plenty of fun and memorable times in their fine city (including jumping a flight of stairs and sticking the landing, crushing my ankle in the process). I also have a close friend who works at BGSU and so I can’t in good conscience pick against them this weekend. Money lined be damned and a Maryland team fresh off a win against Texas I’m picking the Falcons! Talon’s up for the Orange and Brown as they knock off the Terrapins in a close game where QB Jarret Doege hits his favorite target Scott Miller for 3 TD’s and we all go celebrate with fishbowls, Tubby’s long islands, and legals joints for everybody!

Prediction: Bowling Green’s cumulative BAC by  2AM will be 1,000,000 times the legal limit.

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University of Toledo (+1000) vs Bye week (-700)

Not capitalizing on arguably the best play of week 1 is such a Toledo move.

Taking a week off  to cool off from going viral is the type of move that converts UT fans to BGSU fans overnight. Bowling Green already has the better bars, better dorms, better food, better….well you get the point. Again huge mistake not capitalizing on the new found fame. Back to the actual football game.

Oh did you guys need a week off from beating up some cadets?

Bragging about beating up on a military school? Yikes…..pretty sure that’s a good way to get your fans to cut the rockets off of their sweaters and gym shorts.

Side note: @UTBarstool if you have the same viceroy from last season and you’re  reading this.

We’re back and our shitty blog has over 5000 views, 3 new bloggers, and nearly 3000 unique visitors with no signs of slowing down. I could punch down and talk about how you’re basically all the worst parts of Barstool wrapped into one, and your tweets are low effort garbage, but I won’t I’ll take the high road.

Prediction: UT students will flock by the hundreds thousands to Bowling Green this weekend to experience a real college town.

 

University of Toledo I’ve laid down the gauntlet and sided with the superior college team in Northwest Ohio.

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